Joey Washburn - Married.

This is Joey.

This is the guy who:

• refused to wear Nike throughout high school;

swore off jeans and wore nothing but corduroys for three years;

• baptized the backseat of my 1982 Skylark in Bud Light and then proceeded to desecrate an elementary school playground;

shaved his head, pierced his face, and grew a big ass beard in college.

This is Joey immediately after tying the knot at the Orange County home of his fiancee (now wife, I guess).

How bizarre it is to think that I've been friends with this guy since I was 14 years old and that now he has a wife. This really shouldn't come as a shock to me. Hell, I was engaged just seven months ago. Still, it's much different seeing your friend go as opposed to doing it yourself. Besides, I called this one years ago. Back at high school debate camp in Ann Arbor during the summer of 1997, I told Joey that he was going to be carting around a minivan with a wife and three kids someday. He scoffed. This was right after he got done showing off his new purchase of a "I like the Pope, the Pope smokes dope" t-shirt. The little poseur had never even touched dope...

I do hope that the two of them are incredibly happy together. They do make a cute couple...especially now that Joey has hair.

Anyway, many congratulations, Joey and Amanda, and best of luck.